


an orphan, again

by SalazarTipton



Series: devil!dad and spidey!son [2]
Category: Daredevil (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Canon Disabled Character, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Matt is Peter's dad, Orphan Peter Parker, Peter-centric, Survivor Guilt, devildad, spideyson, the direct aftermath of may and ben's deaths
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-25
Updated: 2018-11-25
Packaged: 2019-08-28 22:57:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 875
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16732248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SalazarTipton/pseuds/SalazarTipton
Summary: --but they are gone. He grips tighter onto May’s rosary in his palm and screws his eyes shut. His brain feels like it’s under pressure and he can’t bring any of the prayers she used to say to the forefront of his mind. He won’t let himself break down here in this weird waiting room with beige walls and uncomfortable chairs.Just hold it together. You can’t let them see. You gotta…





	an orphan, again

Peter can’t stop thinking about it. He keeps telling himself that he could have stopped it and he  _ should have _ , but he still can’t conceptualize just how he’d have done anything about it. A teenager versus a mugger with a gun? Logically, he knows that all that makes for is three dead Parkers instead of two, but that doesn’t help his guilt any. 

This plastic seat some adult he didn’t catch the name of pointed him to is a little cold and very uncomfortable--just like the one’s outside of Principal Morita’s office. Right now it sure as hell feels like he’s in trouble, but it’s on the opposite end of the oh-shit spectrum that he’s gotten used to of being reported for “fights” with Flash. This trouble feels like drowning and there’s nobody around to hear him call for help. He slinks down into the chair and put in his headphones. If the world can’t hear him, he doesn’t want to hear it. 

He shuffles his playlist and ends up skipping the first nine songs because each of them bring up memories he’ll never experience again from he and Uncle Ben poorly serenading Aunt May in the car, them dancing in the kitchen with May leading, one of them pulling an earbud out of his ear because he missed them calling him to dinner for the past five minutes. Peter throws up the hood of his jacket and whips haphazardly at his wet eyes. 

When his aunt and uncle took him in, they never said he wouldn’t be alone again or have to deal with death or any of the other things he was feeling at the time. No, May sat with him and told him straight up that she’d do everything she could to help him move on from all this pain and hurt; she’d make it her mission to put good into his life and love and warmth. Peter didn’t want to believe her at the time because deep down he knew it would all happen again. 

Aunt May and Uncle Ben are gone; their bodies somewhere stored away in drawers with Y cuts in their chests and bullets in specimen jars--at least that’s what all those reruns of  _ Law & Order _ have told Peter--but they are gone. He grips tighter onto May’s rosary in his palm and screws his eyes shut. His brain feels like it’s under pressure and he can’t bring any of the prayers she used to say to the forefront of his mind. He won’t let himself break down here in this weird waiting room with beige walls and uncomfortable chairs.  _ Just hold it together. You can’t let them see. You gotta… _

His eyes un-focus as he recedes into himself thinking of everything he can that’s not related to all this: the upcoming science test, something Ned said at lunch today, how he’s going to destroy Flash in the robotics club tournament next month. Peter keeps himself removed enough from the space he’s in that he doesn’t see the three nicely dressed adults being directed to the office he’s sitting outside of. 

The woman and shorter man hold back as the man with the cane swallows hard and starts walking towards Peter. The teen looks up, the tapping against the floor catching his attention. Peter sits up a little straighter in his seat when he stops in front of Peter and motions to the seat, saying something. Peter takes out his earbuds and nods. When Matt doesn’t respond his kicks himself a little. 

“Go for it,” he says, not sure if Matt wants the seat or if he said something else entirely.

“I’m Matt. The two ogling us down there are my friends, Karen and Foggy.”

“I’m--I’m Peter. His name’s Foggy? Like the weather?” Peter asks, forgetting himself for a second.

He catches Matt’s quick smirk in a flash in the corner of his eye when he looks back to the man and woman trying to look casual and completely failing by the receptionist desk. “It’s a nickname.”

“Why are you talking to me?” Peter scrunches his face a little. He doesn’t want to be rude, but he really just wants to be left alone right now. He can’t help his tone coming out a little strained. Matt doesn’t seem to be bother by it, though. 

“The child services officer in there called me about you,” Matt says as succinctly as he can with a vague motion towards the office door. His throat is growing tight. “Did your aunt and uncle ever talk about what would happen if this came to pass?”

Peter clenches his jaw. He ignores the moistures starting up again along his lashline, feeling a little more secure knowing Matt won’t know he’s crying unless he starts sounding blubbery. 

“I, uh, overheard them one time talking about their plan. They don’t know, I mean didn’t know I was listening. A lot of it was about money stuff I didn’t understand but there was another thing,” Peter stop to sniffle and take a few breaths, “Are you…?”

Matt gives him a somber nod. “Yeah, I’m your--well, I don’t exactly know how you want to label that,” he admits, ducking his head a little. 

**Author's Note:**

> wow, those feels hurt me.
> 
> please let me know what you think! i have no way to know if you like it and want more unless there's feedback, buds. kudos and comments are my lifeblood, and you can always come find me on [tumblr](http://bialiencowboy.tumblr.com/) :D


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